Thursday, January 15, 2009

Urgency to save daughter from unsuitable boys makes for drastic action

I referred to above of a mother coming in search of urgent money. I can’t understand why she cannot borrow from her own children who she has given most of her possessions to and some who are well settled.

She has a daughter who is 17 who had an unsuitable boy friend and somehow managed to wean her out of that relationship, after she was hospitalized for an overdose of drugs arising out of the disagreement with her mother on her choice of mate at that tender age. In order to ensure she does not get involved with similar types, she scouted around and introduced a man in the neighboring village, who was in the army drawing a salary of Rs25,000 a month, and got her daughter to agree to marry him. The relationship outwardly appears to be a happy one.

In order that the Registrar of Marriages authorizes the marriage, the girl has got to be 18, and so for payment of a bribe, he would agree to falsify the date of birth of the girl. The girl is now 3 months pregnant, the boy stays with the girl when on leave from the army. I am only reporting all this as it came from the mother, so I am not vouching the accuracy of the mother’s story.

The soldier when married I believe gets marriage allowance over and above the single person’s allowance, and one should also point out that if the soldier dies in action, the wife will continue to receive his salary.

Both the person who introduced the man to the mother and the Registrar of Marriages who was persuaded to falsify have to be bribed in whatever name you call it. She needed the money urgently even though the soldier’s salary in a few weeks will cover all these costs, but she wants to pay it herself.

This mother has already lost a son years ago to the ongoing war in the North and she knows what it is like to lose a child, but the newly wed wife from that son, left the son’s home soon after his death and returned to her home village, where she still draws the husband’s salary.

The mother justifies by saving the daughter from getting into trouble, as any other man she got involved with will have to be given the girl so this way she chooses the husband. Additionally, the house the mother lives in is for the daughter, so the mother would rather live with a son-in-law she approves of rather than be turfed out of her own house by one who she disagrees with!


DeeCee said...


realskullzero said...

hmmm...interesting post..I guess its where poverty leads people...Some times people have to make choices that may not always seem right....but that's how you would have to survive i guess ...